Feet on Earth

Let’s start in the middle. Tuesday May 1st, 2018 Tonight I walked nekked (that’s Steve Poltz for naked) outside a cabin in the woods all alone. I drank full moon water and danced in the smoke of a smudge stick. I walked¬† down to the river over a pile of ice and blanket of pine…

Good Grief

I’ve been thinking a lot about grief lately. (full disclosure: I’m always thinking a lot about grief). I don’t want to brag, but I’m kind of a grief expert.¬†It’s been a constant presence in our lives for over three years and I’ve studied it from all angles. Well… I’ve studied our own grief. It so…

Happy birthday – the kids are alright.

Happy birthday Jason, This year we celebrated your day in typical birthday style; with your favourite food (meat!) and a round of “Happy Birthday Dad” before diving into cake. As always, we talked about you lots (do your ears burn in the afterlife?) and shared funny memories, most of which have been told millions of…

Three Years…

Dear Hoop, This coming Saturday marks three years since your death. Three years of replaying every last conversation we had. Three years of seeing you through my rearview mirror as you buckled up the kids and said good-bye for the last time. Three years of watching you live and breathe in our kids. Three years…

i am your willow

i am your willow and i will keep you safe. i will bend. i will adjust. i will surrender: to the process to the storm to myself i will flex to the best of my abilities and i will not break. i will wrap myself around you, and weep with you through joy and grief. i…

Approaching Doomsday

A couple weeks ago, one of the kids asked me how long it had been since…you know.. Daddy… I said that we were coming up to 2 years. “What’s the date?” “May 6th” “I don’t want that day to come. I don’t want it to be another year without him.” From that point on, it’s…

Unicorns – by Moxie

On Monday morning, first day of March Break, I was in the bathtub getting ready for the day when Moxie (my 9 year old) came in and sat on the floor beside me. “Mom, I wrote this thing a while ago but just decided that I wanted to share it with you,” In my head…