I run to lose weight….(wait for it…)

I got home from an exceptionally long Monday & was on the brink of shrugging off my originally planned run. Excuses were there for the taking: I was tired. (Yeah I know..join the club). I’d already missed the last 4 days..what’s one more? I can’t leave the kids for another 30 minutes, that’s poor parenting. (Psst…they’re too busy playing outside with their friends to notice). I’ve pretty much lost my layer of hibernation so what’s the point? 

Then I read a post by Jennifer Pastiloff who, looking fierce AF stated, “I exercise because if I don’t, I’m a mess.” #preach 

Running clothes on & out the door I started to think about why I run and realized it IS to lose weight. The kind of weight that sits in my mind. It’s not clutter or cobwebs or dustbunnies. It’s heavy & makes it hard to move. It’s atrophic. Being outside alone with my thoughts & minimal distraction helps me shake that shit loose. I practice my own style of active meditation (even though I like to insist I suck at meditation). I come home clearer. And lighter. 

Side benefit is setting a good example for the kids about how to deal with daily stress & anxiety. Had I not gone running, I most likely would have poured a glass of wine for dinner &/or scrolled through social media numbing my brain. And let’s be honest, I still might pour a glass of wine & tada here I am on social media..cause (thank Gawd) I’m not perfect but I’ve managed to changed the tone of my evening. 

I’m not fast. Nor do I typically run more than 5km at a time. But this is not a contest. And even though I’m not trying to win anything, I gain so much …. by losing this weight. 

Thanks for the reminder Jennifer!!! 

How do you lose that extra weight in your mind?

xo,
e

(Ps-how lucky am I to have this gorgeous lake to run around?!?!)

twitter: @pixiepaperdoll7

instagram: @pixiepaperdoll

Don’t be an asshole and let fear stop you

I posted my first video blog on you tube:  Don’t be an asshole and let fear stop you

Here is the written version:

Hi

In honour of my public speaking course at Trent, I’ve decided to try a video blog.

When I announced my enrollment into the course on social media (hence, when it became official) I received very encouraging feedback – thanks friends and followers!

Some wrote that they believed me to be incredibly brave – fearless in fact! Wow – that is so amazing but yet, so far from the truth.

I am actually scared of almost everything.

From “Did I hear something move in the bedroom?” to “Why is that squirrel looking at me like that?” to “What happens if I fail?”

I used this example in my class and my teacher asked me, so why do they think you’re brave?

Because I don’t let it stop me.

Because I kind of like that adrenaline rush of, holy shit here we go!

Whether I’m creeping upstairs to the bedroom with a hockey stick ready to smash any potential intruders or packing up everything to start a brand new life. I have now done this twice though for very different reasons.

I moved to Peterborough for love and change. I have found both.

But hot damn, is it ever scary.

And I have had to come to terms with the fact that not everything hardly anything is going to happen exactly how I had planned it.

Isn’t that humbling?

and scary.

Thankfully I have the most amazing network of friends and family who help me put things in perspective and most importantly, remind me to laugh.

I have learned to let go of my ego and recognize that there is a limit to how much I can control in my life.

I follow Jennifer Pastiloff on social media and she has a “Don’t be an asshole.” mantra which I love and repeat to myself multiple times per day.

Here is my version:

Don’t be an asshole and let fear stop you. Don’t think that the bend in the road is the end of the road. Let go of your ego and keep moving. Keep living. And keep laughing. Preferably at yourself.

xo

e

@pixiepaperdoll7

Feature on Manifest-Station

I am so incredibly honoured to have had my “Dear Jerk” letter posted on The Manifest-Station and I am beyond blown away by the overwhelming response.

Thank you Jennifer Pastiloff for this opportunity:

http://themanifeststation.net/2014/12/04/dear-jerk-a-letter-to-the-father-of-my-kids-after-he-took-his-own-life/

And remember,
you are not alone.

xo
e